Official Blood Wars Board | Offtopic | Chuck Norris plays BW you know

Official Blood Wars Board » General » Offtopic » Chuck Norris plays BW you know

» Hello Guest [Login|Register]

Last Post | First Unread Post

Print Page | Recommend to a Friend | Add Thread to Favorites

Pages (2): [1] 2 next »

Chuck Norris plays BW you know

Author

Post

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »

Artoir.
Avenger

Registration Date: 02-24-2008
Posts: 1,111
Location: Ireland
Race in game: Beastmaster
Clan: V13

Chuck Norris plays BW you know

Awfully bored

Chuck Norris got his Light Dagger of Suicide to Perfect (+5) without Ritual. Twice.

Chuck Norris soloed Anubis at level 47, with his Bare Hands.

Chuck Norris got his White Dragon Badge, 3 minutes before the server started.

Chuck Norris can beat Cezars with a club. Just one.

Chuck Norris has a 3rd Thunderfist in his chin.

Chuck Norris has his brothel at level 78, there's never enough women to satisfy Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris forgot to change out of his rep gear doing St. Benedict's siege. He won the siege. In one round. On his own.

Chuck Norris doesn't have a Police Station. Chuck Norris is The Law.

Sushi pays Chuck Norris 1million people every time he upgrades his Employment Agency.

Chuck Norris can merge a Titanium ring of Youth, from a bracelet of Authority and a Signet of Strength.

182,000 Vampires die from Chuck Norris-related accidents every year.

Chuck Norris can solo a black dragon with just a nod of the head, and a stroke of the beard. (Natedogg)

There are no expedition monsters, only creatures Chuck Norris has left alive (Natedogg)

Contrary to popular belief, Bloodwars is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship. (Natedogg)

Chuck cannot bookmark BloodWars, his computer doesn't have a control button (he is always in control (GodLikeFriend)

chuck norris is rumoured to have a personal vendetta against RNG. looks like he finally met his match..... (popeye)

Chuck Norris is so tough, Medusa chose to commit suicide rather than fight him (popeye)

The Hydra doesn't attack in the first round against Chuck Norris. (Hamstergod)

Chuck Norris never looses blood, ever. (Hamstergod)

Chuck Norris is the Lord of Darkness. (Hamstergod)

There are no dragons, just lizards Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked into different shades. (Hamstergod)

Before he goes on a quest, Chuck Norris asks for what he wants; and gets it.
(GodLikeFriend)

Some say, Chuck Norris owns a Perfect elvish Hard hat, and during the trek to the corner shop found an Insidious Animal Signet of Levitation. (oh_teh_noes)

Some say Chuck Norris is the unknown power that makes X unable to attack. (oh_teh_noes)

Chuck Norris is the one who forces the server to back up finish before 4:30 AM (oh_teh_noes)

Some say he forged Szeszej's wrought iron banhammer using not a hammer and anvil, but his sheer self-importance and a can of Campbells soup. (oh_teh_noes)

According to old dryad legend, Chuck broke down a mergestone to create two lifestones and a soulstone. (oh_teh_noes)

Chuck norris is currently the only player to be in Act the third. (oh_teh_noes)

Apparently, CN won blood wars. Thats it, thats the end. Hope you enjoyed the game guys!!! (oh_teh_noes)

Some say he invented a breakfast cereal using nothing but spare mana and banned user-accounts. (oh_teh_noes)

Chuck Norris allegedly sold his soul to the developers, in order to become the final secret expedition boss. (oh_teh_noes)

Chuck Norris is the clan with most points. (Hamstergod)

Chuck Norris automatically overtakes squares he wants. (Hamstergod)

Chuck Norris has a legendary beard. (Hamstergod)

Chuck Norris has toughness so high that DIablo's bullets bounce off him (Raxis)

Chuck Norris looked at the hydras left head and the other 2 died (Demondude)

Ritual of Sacrifice is a metaphor for 'Please Chuck Norris, could you upgrade this item?' (Diablo)

Chuck Norris destroys your square when he attack you. (Diablo)

If you try to name your son Chuck Norris you're instantly killed - in real life. (Diablo)

Only Chuck Norris can scream in the Screaming room. (Diablo)
Chuck Norris has his owns set. Set bonus: Roundhouse Kick = instant kill. (Diablo)

Chuck Norris Takes Out The Top 10 Clans In Underworld Without Breaking A Sweat (Lightknight)

Scorpid Venom is actually Chuck Norris' urine. (Raxis)

Chuck Norris IS the RNG because he can screw us all (Raxis)

chuck norris is the only BW player who can weild two maces.....at the same time (Sarahahahahah?)

(twin leg perfect Radiating Mace of Suicide (+5) and if he posted his highest crit the internet would crash) (Sarahahahahah?)

Post your own Wink

__________________

05-29-2009 19:24

NateDogg
unregistered

Chuck Norris can solo a black dragon with just a nod of the head, and a stroke of the beard.

There are no expeditions. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

Contrary to popular belief, Bloodwars is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

This post has been edited 3 time(s), it was last edited by NateDogg: 05-29-2009 19:35.

05-29-2009 19:26

God_Like_Friend
Lord

Registration Date: 03-31-2008
Posts: 489
Location: England
Clan: BoS

Chuck cannot bookmark BloodWars, his computer doesn't have a control button (he is always in control Tongue

)

__________________

quote:

Originally posted by Szeszej
And btw Agresiel your signature needs an update, it's more than a year now Wink

Ingame: R1 NoOb-G R2 NoOb-GoD - ID 7

05-29-2009 19:41

Artoir.
Avenger

Registration Date: 02-24-2008
Posts: 1,111
Location: Ireland
Race in game: Beastmaster
Clan: V13

Thread Starter Thread Started by Artoir.

Added

__________________

05-29-2009 19:44

Pops
moderator...apparently

Registration Date: 10-22-2008
Posts: 652
Location: england
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: BoS

chuck norris is so tough, medusa chose to commit suicide rather than fight him

__________________
No, you didn't imagine it, I DID just go there Big Grin

05-29-2009 19:49

makavelli
Triple Ace

Registration Date: 04-19-2008
Posts: 170
Location: bristol,england
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: BOS

RE: Chuck Norris plays BW you know

Chuck is a stunt double for the chuckle brothers

__________________
only god can judge me
<a href="http://eu.playstation.com/psn/profile/Michaelprice/"><img src="http://mypsn.eu.playstation.com/psn/profile/Michaelprice.png" border="0" /></a>

05-29-2009 19:51

HamsterGod
Double Ace

Registration Date: 12-30-2008
Posts: 117
Location: Slovakia
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: HLL

The Hydra doesn't attack in the first round against Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris never looses blood, never
Chuck Norris is the Lord of Darkness
There are no dragons just lizards Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked into different shades.

__________________
Spamming does not make you interesting, cool or clever, it just makes you annoying.

05-29-2009 19:52

God_Like_Friend
Lord

Registration Date: 03-31-2008
Posts: 489
Location: England
Clan: BoS

Before he goes on a quest, Chuck Norris asks for what he wants; and gets it.

__________________

quote:

Originally posted by Szeszej
And btw Agresiel your signature needs an update, it's more than a year now Wink

Ingame: R1 NoOb-G R2 NoOb-GoD - ID 7

05-29-2009 19:56

Artoir.
Avenger

Registration Date: 02-24-2008
Posts: 1,111
Location: Ireland
Race in game: Beastmaster
Clan: V13

Thread Starter Thread Started by Artoir.

Added

Makavelli they have to be BW related Wink

__________________

05-29-2009 20:00

oh_teh_noes
Double Ace

Registration Date: 12-15-2008
Posts: 101
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: Boot Camp

Some say, Chuck Norris owns a Perfect elvish Hard hat, and during the trek to the corner shop found an Insidious Animal Signet of Levitation.

Some say he invented a breakfast cereal using nothing but spare mana and banned user-accounts.

Chuck Norris allegedly sold his soul to the developers, in order to become the final secret expedition boss.

EDIT:

Some say Chuck Norris is the unknown power that makes X unable to attack.

Some say Chuck Norris has an internal harddrive.

Chuck Norris is the one who forces the server to back up finish before 4:30 AM

And on the first day, Chuck Norris created God. And he saw that it was good. God proceeded to be Chucks maid, and created the skies and the earth on command.

Some say he forged Szeszej's wrought iron banhammer using not a hammer and anvil, but his sheer self-importance and a can of Campbells soup.

According to an unreliable source, in soviet russia, Chuck is beaten up by YOU! According to various other sources this proverb is as bent as a £9 note.

Chuck Norris fought the law, and the law lost.

According to old dryad legend, Chuck broke down a mergestone to create two lifestones and a soulstone.

Chuck norris is currently the only player to be in Act the third.

Apparently, CN won blood wars. Thats it, thats the end. Hope you enjoyed the game guys!!!

__________________

Ingame Underworld: Oh_Teh_Noes
Ingame Necropolis: Cubic

This post has been edited 3 time(s), it was last edited by oh_teh_noes: 05-29-2009 21:55.

05-29-2009 20:01

Artoir.
Avenger

Registration Date: 02-24-2008
Posts: 1,111
Location: Ireland
Race in game: Beastmaster
Clan: V13

Thread Starter Thread Started by Artoir.

quote:

Originally posted by oh_teh_noes
Some say he invented a breakfast cereal using nothing but spare mana and banned user-accounts.

Lol added

__________________

05-29-2009 20:05

HamsterGod
Double Ace

Registration Date: 12-30-2008
Posts: 117
Location: Slovakia
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: HLL

Chuck Norris is the clan with most points

Chuck Norris automatically overtakes squares he wants

Chuck Norris has a legendary beard

Chuck Norris banned Szeszej :-)

__________________
Spamming does not make you interesting, cool or clever, it just makes you annoying.

This post has been edited 1 time(s), it was last edited by HamsterGod: 05-29-2009 20:12.

05-29-2009 20:07

Raxis
Set Abominae

Registration Date: 12-12-2007
Posts: 1,168
Race in game: Beastmaster

quote:

Chuck Norris banned Szeszej :-)

HAHAHA

Chuck Norris has toughness so high that DIablo's bullets bounce off him

__________________
Create the infinite and expand the question.
Count to number seven.
Your day of rest creates infection,
Your imperfection.

05-29-2009 20:18

Pops
moderator...apparently

Registration Date: 10-22-2008
Posts: 652
Location: england
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: BoS

chuck norris is rumoured to have a personal vendetta against RNG. looks like he finally met his match.....

__________________
No, you didn't imagine it, I DID just go there Big Grin

05-29-2009 20:49

DemonDude2
Lord

Registration Date: 11-18-2008
Posts: 483
Location: United Counties of Ireland :D
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: >:D

Chuck Norris looked at the hydras left head and the other 2 died

__________________

'Imagine waking up, and finding out you have the wrong blankey'

05-29-2009 21:42

diablo
The contract has expired - former moderator.

Registration Date: 07-05-2007
Posts: 1,275
Location: Hell
Race in game: Cultist
Clan: BoS

Ritual of Sacrifice is a metaphor for 'Please Chuck Norris, could you upgrade this item?'
Chuck Norris destroys your square when he attack you.
If you try to name your son Chuck Norris you're instantly killed - in real life.
Only Chuck Norris can scream in the Screaming room.
Chuck Norris has his owns set. Set bonus: Roundhouse Kick = instant kill.

__________________

05-29-2009 21:55

LightKnight
Member

Registration Date: 05-05-2009
Posts: 44
Location: My Bed
Race in game: Beastmaster
Clan: Sanguine

Chuck Norris Takes Out The Top 10 Clans In Underworld Without Breaking A Sweat

Chuck Norris Once Killed The Un Killable Lord of Darkness The Sector Overseer Of Zone 1 With His Bare Hands

I Once Heard That Chuck Teamed Up With The Stig Off Top Gear And Took Out every Player On The Bw Game.

__________________
Mmmmm Mushy Peassss!!!

This post has been edited 1 time(s), it was last edited by LightKnight: 05-30-2009 00:21.

05-29-2009 22:01

Raxis
Set Abominae

Registration Date: 12-12-2007
Posts: 1,168
Race in game: Beastmaster

Scorpid Venom is actually Chuck Norris' urine.

Chuck Norris IS the RNG because he can screw us all

__________________
Create the infinite and expand the question.
Count to number seven.
Your day of rest creates infection,
Your imperfection.

This post has been edited 1 time(s), it was last edited by Raxis: 05-29-2009 22:23.

05-29-2009 22:18

Sarahahaha
Full Member

Registration Date: 08-29-2008
Posts: 50
Location: Northants/Milton Keynes
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: [Sanguine]

chuck norris is the only BW player who can weild two maces.....at the same time

(twin leg perfect Radiating Mace of Suicide (+5) and if he posted his highest crit the internet would crash)

05-29-2009 22:56

Artoir.
Avenger

Registration Date: 02-24-2008
Posts: 1,111
Location: Ireland
Race in game: Beastmaster
Clan: V13

Thread Starter Thread Started by Artoir.

Lol all up

__________________

05-29-2009 23:29

RinghamEnderol
Double Ace

Registration Date: 04-06-2009
Posts: 117
Location: England
Clan: LIG / SOT

Chuck's Crits with Mace are so high SushiMaker thought it was high Christmas Bonus

__________________
Underworld Character: Ringham - 1h gunner and Proud former member of Clockers

Former Necropolis Character: Enderol (Unfortunately Deleted now) and since Re-incarnated! - Clan leader of Sovereigns of Time

05-30-2009 00:13

Sarahahaha
Full Member

Registration Date: 08-29-2008
Posts: 50
Location: Northants/Milton Keynes
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: [Sanguine]

chuck norris ws so irratated that artoir couldent gess sarah wasent smart enough to think that up and it was spawnraloom who posted on the wrong acount.....again (which she wouldent have it on auto log on arfter my one logs on :S )

...o yeah he was so irratated that he made the boared crash till art updates this the post with spawns name Tongue

05-30-2009 00:23

diablo
The contract has expired - former moderator.

Registration Date: 07-05-2007
Posts: 1,275
Location: Hell
Race in game: Cultist
Clan: BoS

Chuck Norris keeps his defence even when using suicide weapons.
Chuck Norris can use Shuriken of Vengeance and Hunter's tattoos at the same time.
Chuck Norris has all the tattoos.
The Hatchery is Chuck Norris' toilet.
Chuck Norris has zero luck and found all the best items.
Chuck Norris never failed a quest.
Chuck Norris has no premium but still has infinite attacks.

EDIT:
Chuck Norris never spams, what he posts is more than important.

__________________

05-30-2009 00:47

Raxis
Set Abominae

Registration Date: 12-12-2007
Posts: 1,168
Race in game: Beastmaster

Chuck Norris is his own bloodwars race, with Roundhouse kick arcana

__________________
Create the infinite and expand the question.
Count to number seven.
Your day of rest creates infection,
Your imperfection.

05-30-2009 02:10

oh_teh_noes
Double Ace

Registration Date: 12-15-2008
Posts: 101
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: Boot Camp

Some say he was banned long long ago, for actually being able to pronounce 'Szeszej'

__________________

Ingame Underworld: Oh_Teh_Noes
Ingame Necropolis: Cubic

05-30-2009 02:35

Raxis
Set Abominae

Registration Date: 12-12-2007
Posts: 1,168
Race in game: Beastmaster

Others say he banned everyone else for not being able to pronounce szeszej

__________________
Create the infinite and expand the question.
Count to number seven.
Your day of rest creates infection,
Your imperfection.

This post has been edited 1 time(s), it was last edited by Raxis: 05-30-2009 02:38.

05-30-2009 02:37

Platinum_avatar
Forum Ace

Registration Date: 05-10-2008
Posts: 91
Location: U.K. (Manchester/York)
Clan: TCR

Vacation and protection time don't effect Chuck Norris; he attacks who he wants, when he wants.
If Chuck Norris wants to destroy an item he doesn't go to the well of souls, he just looks at the item... and he doesn't get mana and nanites, he gets POP and POH

__________________
Necropolis IGN: Into_The_Abyss
Underworld IGN: Platinum_Avatar

This post has been edited 1 time(s), it was last edited by Platinum_avatar: 05-30-2009 03:48.

05-30-2009 03:47

Cthulhu
Viking

Registration Date: 11-29-2007
Posts: 726
Location: UK
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: HL

Chuck Norris passed all of his pilgrimages in one caravan, wearing only a Elegant Cap.

Chuck Norris doesn't quest, he tells the RNG what items he wants & the RNG puts them in his armoury.

Chuck Norris doesn't need to use the Ritual of Sacrifice, the hatchery gives him any monster he wants, at any time he wants it.

Chuck Norris gave Evangelion a warning.

Chuck Norris doesn't need a Hospital, he generates his own PoH at a rate of 10,000 a minute.

Chuck Norris upgraded a normal club to a Perfect Murderous 2h Sword of Suicide+5 with only a blood stone, and a will of steel.

Chuck Norris has more defence in his beard than a Golem on steroids.

Chuck Norris' beard gives +50 agility.

Chuck Norris can equip Perfect Field Full Plate Mail of Death Sower+5 with just his basic stats - but he doesn't need to, he gets more defense & agility from just his beard.

Chuck Norris doesn't use weapons - his hands have more bonuses than a Perfect Diamond Set.

Great thread. Big Grin

__________________

HBS

ENCHANTMENT

This post has been edited 2 time(s), it was last edited by Cthulhu: 05-30-2009 13:41.

05-30-2009 08:43

lilzo
Newbie

Registration Date: 02-20-2009
Posts: 0

chuck norris found a baby by the brothel. taught him everything he knows. but szeszej didnt listen Wink

05-30-2009 11:30

spawnraloom
Triple Ace

Registration Date: 09-11-2008
Posts: 180
Clan: the JOKERs

quote:

Originally posted by lilzo
chuck norris found a baby by the brothel. taught him everything he knows. but szeszej didnt listen Wink

hehehe like it Big Grin

chuck norris dusent attacc ppl any him and jackie chan are in a never ending fight that is lasting more than 10 rounds..... yet chucknorris is still stealing people from brothles

*edit* chuck norris's fists have every sufix and prefix

__________________
have fun good luck, and don't lose to much blood

This post has been edited 2 time(s), it was last edited by spawnraloom: 05-30-2009 14:41.

05-30-2009 13:30

RinghamEnderol
Double Ace

Registration Date: 04-06-2009
Posts: 117
Location: England
Clan: LIG / SOT

Some say Chuck Noris gets Punishment effect just from his beard

Chuck has never lost a seige because all of the enemy die when Chuck looks at them

__________________
Underworld Character: Ringham - 1h gunner and Proud former member of Clockers

Former Necropolis Character: Enderol (Unfortunately Deleted now) and since Re-incarnated! - Clan leader of Sovereigns of Time

05-30-2009 14:40

oh_teh_noes
Double Ace

Registration Date: 12-15-2008
Posts: 101
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: Boot Camp

took me a while:

Now this is a story of about how
I turned BloodWars upside down
And I’d like to take a minute, just sit right there
Ill tell you how I became the king of BloodWars!

In Realm 1 Moria, Born and raised
The merge lists are where I spent most of my days
Questing and Attacking, chillaxing all cool,
Shooting some golems, being generally cruel
When a couple of mods who were up to no good,
Started warning noobs when they never should,
I banned their accounts and szeszej got scared,
He said ‘spare my account, I’ll pay a small indefinite amount’

Artoir couldn’t take it, he warned my account,
But I’m Chuck Norris, the warnings would not surmount,
I spit-shined my Perfect Murderous Mace,
Slapped Arty upside of the face,
I hit so hard, I sent him to the beginning,
Reset his account, now I’ll be the one winning.

I whistled for a cab, and when it came near,
It’s a taxi level 10, I saw with a cheer,
On this luck I wasn’t banking,
But I thought, ‘Now to the top of the rankings!’

I pulled up the rankings, about at 7 or 8
Beating top players, starting to desecrate,
When I crit hitted Cesarz, I was Top of hi-scores,
I sit on my throne, the King of BloodWars!

__________________

Ingame Underworld: Oh_Teh_Noes
Ingame Necropolis: Cubic

05-30-2009 15:19

LightKnight
Member

Registration Date: 05-05-2009
Posts: 44
Location: My Bed
Race in game: Beastmaster
Clan: Sanguine

Hahah Thats Veryyy Good Lol Smile

__________________
Mmmmm Mushy Peassss!!!

05-30-2009 15:27

Hayz_M
Double Ace

Registration Date: 08-23-2008
Posts: 112
Race in game: Beastmaster

loools omg thas class XD woop woop king of bloodwars..

I hear Chuck Norris created bloodwars (he gave sushi or whoever the idea Wink

)

05-30-2009 18:14

darc
Viking

Registration Date: 01-17-2008
Posts: 691
Race in game: Absorber

There are no white dragons in the wasteland only black dragons that have seen chuck norris.

05-30-2009 20:27

Artoir.
Avenger

Registration Date: 02-24-2008
Posts: 1,111
Location: Ireland
Race in game: Beastmaster
Clan: V13

Thread Starter Thread Started by Artoir.

quote:

Originally posted by oh_teh_noes
took me a while:

Now this is a story of about how
I turned BloodWars upside down
And I’d like to take a minute, just sit right there
Ill tell you how I became the king of BloodWars!

In Realm 1 Moria, Born and raised
The merge lists are where I spent most of my days
Questing and Attacking, chillaxing all cool,
Shooting some golems, being generally cruel
When a couple of mods who were up to no good,
Started warning noobs when they never should,
I banned their accounts and szeszej got scared,
He said ‘spare my account, I’ll pay a small indefinite amount’

Artoir couldn’t take it, he warned my account,
But I’m Chuck Norris, the warnings would not surmount,
I spit-shined my Perfect Murderous Mace,
Slapped Arty upside of the face,
I hit so hard, I sent him to the beginning,
Reset his account, now I’ll be the one winning.

I whistled for a cab, and when it came near,
It’s a taxi level 10, I saw with a cheer,
On this luck I wasn’t banking,
But I thought, ‘Now to the top of the rankings!’

I pulled up the rankings, about at 7 or 8
Beating top players, starting to desecrate,
When I crit hitted Cesarz, I was Top of hi-scores,
I sit on my throne, the King of BloodWars!

Lol very nice

Ok people are posting at a rate which is faster than I can update, I give up Tongue

__________________

05-30-2009 21:39

oh_teh_noes
Double Ace

Registration Date: 12-15-2008
Posts: 101
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: Boot Camp

just make a wall of fame, like top 20 or something

also, cheers ^^

__________________

Ingame Underworld: Oh_Teh_Noes
Ingame Necropolis: Cubic

05-30-2009 21:43

Zatoichi
Member

Registration Date: 12-09-2007
Posts: 32
Race in game: Absorber
Clan: None.

Chuck Norris wouldn't dare play BW if Bruce Lee was still around.

__________________
Ingame Name/Hitansi Now quit.

05-31-2009 01:47

diablo
The contract has expired - former moderator.

Registration Date: 07-05-2007
Posts: 1,275
Location: Hell
Race in game: Cultist
Clan: BoS

Luck determines how much Chuck Norris likes you. Max luck is 10.000

__________________

05-31-2009 01:52

Raxis
Set Abominae

Registration Date: 12-12-2007
Posts: 1,168
Race in game: Beastmaster

Owned

DAMN PS3 meant to be a PM sorry

__________________
Create the infinite and expand the question.
Count to number seven.
Your day of rest creates infection,
Your imperfection.

This post has been edited 1 time(s), it was last edited by Raxis: 05-31-2009 03:48.

05-31-2009 03:47

Pages (2): [1] 2 next »

Tree Structure | Board Structure

Jump to:

Official Blood Wars Board » General » Offtopic » Chuck Norris plays BW you know